This smells off.

It must have been hard for Donald Russell at school. All that Maths and English and Science and stinky Geography. After all, such academic pursuits would have been almost irrelevant given what wee Donald was day dreaming about as he most likely stared out across the playground to the rain lashed heather and thistles beyond. […]

Dare to dream.

Last night I had a dream where I was walking up a really steep hill lined with expensive but tasteless houses. When I got to the top there was a kind of piazza and I noticed a restaurant/café style place that looked interesting. It turns out it was owned by Beyoncé and Kanye West, which […]

Things to do in August. Part 1.

It’s good to have a back up. Better to have two. Even better to have…..tell you what, let’s just pretend you get the idea. I have a little list of things I could write about but the problem is I just don’t want to at the moment, so I’m falling back on an old favourite […]

Piled high.

Corfu is a beautiful island. Well, some of it is. It is beautiful in that battered kind of island way. Corfu right now isn’t so much sun kissed as sun humped roughly from behind by a couple of swarthy fisherman. The beaches and the heat are all fine but you wouldn’t need more than a […]

Cor-few.

3 weeks. Where did they go? Never mind, I’m starting to relax a bit and soak up the sun in Corfu. Before I came here I don’t think I could have told you anything about Corfu, certainly nothing reliable. To be honest I wasn’t really sure where it was and if you know what I […]

What stupid looks like in Thailand.

Coach (excitedly): “Come on lads, this is the last training exercise, I promise. It’s just a dangerous cave complex, nothing could possibly go wrong.” Child 1 (apprehensively): “But coach, I don’t really like caves, they’re dark and spooky and we don’t have even the simplest of basic safety equipment.” Coach (dismissively): “Oh don’t worry about […]

The benefits of porridge.

It occurred to me yesterday when I was ranting about the rapper XXXShotdeadinhiscar# that perhaps I was being a bit mean. So once I’d posted I took another look at his rap sheet (pun intended) and quite reasonably decided that I had made a good point. In doing all that it also dawned on me […]

Not what you’d call a loss.

It’s been a while, sorry. I can only assume you’ve managed to muddle through without me. I’ve been busier than usual lately and with a well known football competition exceeding all expectations I haven’t really found the time or inclination to do a scrap of anything else. Fortunately I have been roused from my torpor […]

Service my arse.

Let’s take the good old 0 to 10 rating system. 0 being the worst and 10 being the best. Then let’s take 5 as the average, the mediocre, and then make that 5 the 10 so that everything beneath 10 is less than average. Then we repeat the process a few times until 10 marks […]

A game of less than one half.

So, the World Cup has arrived (almost) and may I be the last to give a very feeble woo and hoo. It has been a long time since I had any worthwhile interest in football. I’m delighted that the women’s game has become more prominent but when the announcers mention a cup final or a […]