A pig would send this breakfast back.

I didn’t vote in the local elections. Did you? Not that I mind either way, why would I? It’s not as if I’m the type to judge people without having all the facts. If you did vote then I totally understand – you wanted the politicians to know exactly how you feel about Brexit and […]

Do or DIY.

If the mark of a man is to be handy then I am no man at all. If we talk pure hypothetical and I advertised myself as a handyman and you called me and showed me all the work you needed doing and left me to it for a day then at the end of […]

HE IS RISIBLE.

To be perfectly honest I was going to give my annual Easter message a miss this year. They never seem to do much good. However, last weekend I found my hand being filled by a small leaflet explaining, with the help of a multitude of biblical evidence that “GOD IS SPEAKING through HIS SON Jesus Christ […]

Writing about writing about eating.

Well, I got there in the end. I sent in my competition entry with a day to spare. Now what I can’t do is post that entry here because it is a competition for unpublished work, so if I showed you I’d then have to kill you, which might get complicated. Not least because I […]

Shoot, shoot. Bang, bang.

I’m trying to work on something for a competition at the moment, but I’m struggling to find the suitable levels of inspiration. Sometimes you have to know what you want to say and unfortunately I’m still not sure what I want to say, which is a distinct disadvantage. So here’s a load of crap about […]

Mum’s the word.

Last night I had a great idea for something to write about and then ‘the wife’ asked me something or other and I completely forgot the idea. Shame really because at the time it felt like an absolute belter – it was a simple concept, I’m sure of that, but it seemed like it had […]

I’m probably being too mean.

A few years ago, when I started this award winning site, one of my very first efforts was a lengthy, some might say bloated, piece about the then fad for the fantastically shit ‘ice bucket challenge’ which went on to discuss the general failing of big charity organisations. It should come as no surprise when […]

Smooth Criminal.

Ask me anything you want about Michael Jackson. Anything at all. Was he weird? Yes, he was in another galaxy completely, not a good galaxy I hasten to add. Indeed I would say there is a whole other universe populated by him and anyone who thinks he is the greatest gift that entertainment has given […]

Stupidity aHoy.

I don’t remember the colour but I can sort of remember riding a tricycle when I was very young. The tricycle was eventually replaced with a normal little bicycle, but with stabilisers attached, and I can remember being rather attached to the idea of a bike with stabilisers attached. Then I can remember being on […]

50 Shades of Grayling.

It is little wonder that we are sinking into ever deeper levels of shit when we have people like Chris Grayling in a position of political power. Some politicians are plain awful: think Corbyn, Johnson, Gove – pompous, ineffective, barely good enough to call wankers on their best day. Some are clearly well past their […]