Get on the floor…..it’s Dino-snore.

What a wonderful ‘the wife’ I have! My 40th birthday was 3 months ago and we’ve only just finished celebrating. ‘The wife’ is good at these kinds of things and last night was the final cherry on the top. Humankind has for millennia pondered on the big questions in life and none looms larger than: how […]

Honestly officer………….

There’s been a lot about clowns in the news recently. I should point out (as if it were necessary) that I hate clowns. Not because they’re scary but because they’re pointless. Like wasps and The Lighthouse Family, they serve no real purpose and so in the next few paragraphs I intend to prove this AND […]

Plain ordinary.

Did you think I’d died? Or maybe had my hands obliterated in some bizarre cushion-arranging mishap? Well neither of those things have happened and nor have I been sneakily storing up writing, like a squirrel on amphetamines. I’ve just been very lazy and also quite busy with other things. Actually, scrap the busy bit, I’ve […]

Daily Prompt: Fragile

via Daily Prompt: Fragile Phew, fragile, there’s a good word. Fragile was 3 days ago when everyone was sweating like Vanessa Feltz in a doughnut emporium, utterly unused to such hot weather at this time of year. Only a people as emotionally fragile as we can wish away a hot day because it’s ‘just not […]

Fffffffffacebook.

The other day I turned my back on Facebook. As in permanently. It is very hard indeed to just turn your back on Facebook because you never know what you might be missing. The answer is almost always, no sorry always, always, absolutely nothing. You didn’t need to see a photo of a stranger’s child […]

Films you really should watch # 1

The other night we watched The Legend of Tarzan with our chums, let’s call them Terry and June for the sake of anonymity. The Legend of Tarzan is an effort to reboot the old jungle story for a new generation. It cost $180 million to make, which is a lot. As a film it’s actually not […]

On wellbeing.

I was canoodling with the internet this afternoon, desperately trying to find something stupid, when I stumbled on a list called ’10 steps to wellbeing’ as recommended by a group called ESPA. ESPA are desperate for you to be happy. For all of us to be happy. For us float through life on a big fluffy […]

Potty for pottery.

This morning we attended the 22nd Art In Clay ‘event’ in Hatfield. Not in the centre of Hatfield, because that’s a shithole and this would be like holding a Tupperware party in a sex dungeon. This was on the grounds of Hatfield House and I’m really, really struggling to work out how I ever agreed […]

Just testing the water.

It’s not been as easy as I had hoped. I’ve left it too long. It’s not as if there’s been nothing going on to write about, it’s just that I haven’t been able to pull everything together into one nice, underwhelming, moany dribble and to be honest even this is just a last ditch attempt to find […]

intu the void

If there’s a heaven then there must be a hell. I’m still waiting for proof of either but I know hell on earth can’t be far off Watford High Street. If I could have avoided it yesterday morning I would have, but I couldn’t, so I didn’t. If you’ve never been to Watford you should […]