It’s the end of the world as we know it.

Is this really how it’s all going to end? After all that humankind has achieved, admittedly for better and worse, can’t we go out in better fashion? The planet might be cut in half by an enormous asteroid that no-one, not even that British guy that went to the space station recently (really can’t remember his name […]

I can’t believe my ears.

Music’s a funny thing. Bloody funny. Bloody stupid too. Here’s 3 examples of music related stupidity that have popped up in less than 24 hours. Just today I opened the pointless plastic bag surrounding the newspaper supplements and was greeted with the face of Robbie Williams. Oh joy. You see Robbie may have all the money that […]

Don’t be alarmed.

I’ve lost track of time a bit so I can’t give you the specific point when it started, sorry. It’s probably easier to go much further back. On the basis that male life expectancy in Britain is 78 or something like that we can assume the average person is 39 years old (I’m not sure […]

“Sure have a nose for sh*t.”

Who’s the best director of all time? You could chuck out a few names, and we’d all have a few crossovers. Scorsese would be a good start, he has flair, style, and great taste in music. Spielberg is a craftsman and made ‘Jaws’, one of the very finest films ever, but he’s also liable to […]

GBBO v CIwBG.

It must be nearly September because we’re gearing up for the autumn run towards another bloody Christmas. I don’t want to think about the silly season just yet so I’ll concentrate instead on 135 minutes of last night’s TV. More accurately about 110 minutes, if you take out those nasty, horrible commercial breaks. If The […]

Which one was he?

It’s easy to get confused with names. You could be talking about one person to someone else who could have a completely different idea in their head. All it takes is a different spelling and ignorance. I’m sure we’ve all done it and no-where is it more common than in those frequent occasions when discussing David Guetta, […]

Breaking a sweat.

I’ve just had a meeting with a nurse. She was a big, cheerful Ghanian lady who’s job description I concluded must be to tell you off about your health while smiling a lot and occasionally blasting out one of those brilliant, massive belly laughs that you only get from certain people from certain places in […]

Wasn’t he in Eastenders?

I’ve had some time off lately. It seems that being a paranoid schizophrenic does not always lend itself to a career caring for baby pandas. Whenever I have some time off ‘the wife’ usually finds a few jobs for me to get on with. I’m not moaning because she doesn’t make some daft long list […]

Didn’t he do well?

RIP Bruce Forsyth. Nice chap, I imagine and had a bloody good innings. I know that some of you may think I’m being harsh but I’ll say this anyway. I wasn’t a big fan of Bruce Forsyth. In fact I wasn’t a fan at all and I can honestly say he gave me next to […]

For Lindsi.

Just for you. Shame on me!